Grief is healthy. I must remind myself of this sometimes. Ha! Maybe twice a day, some days. Yet that is part of the process of healing. I must remind myself that it is human to shed tears.
To grieve over the end of a relationship, the death of a friend, health issues, or for any reason in general is a normal human experience. Why have we learned to shun such an emotion? Because it is unpleasant… Is suffering not unpleasant? Is pain not unpleasant?
The result of shoving or dismissing grief is agony, and I often wonder why I would ever choose to stuff my grief into Pandora’s box. If you ignore grief, you dehumanize the process. The result is you are damning yourself to a lifetime of suffering. I am not saying to carry around your past. I am however, suggesting that you learn from it.
Let the past be a guide. Let her speak to you. Let grief be a ritual, one worth honoring. So, you do not go through the cycle on repeat. Give yourself the time and respect to grieve whatever you are going thorough.
Doing your work is messy. It’s not for the faint of heart. Fluids are everywhere. Tears and sweat. But it’s worth the pain. The rehashing of the scars and resetting of the bones. In order to heal.
Some days are better than others. It is not all grey clouds. What has helped me is appreciation. Morning ritual. Cognitive behavior to retrain the insane of the brain. Most of the time if I can keep this train of thought the cloud of grey comes to pass within a few minuets. Life goes on.
Last thought before put the pen down, and this one is really important.
The things people don’t really talk about and keep buried in that little black box… those are the most important mementos of growth.